bakapyrite (bakapyrite) wrote,

Phone call for ad companies: they suck

Just before I arrived at work today there was a commercial that caused me to change the channel. It involved a "customer" calling a "tech support" person, and asking them questions. Of course, these questions are really just a way to discuss the features of the thing that the company is selling. It's cheesy and the technique sucks.

Another one in a similar vein that annoys me is the OnStar commercials. "This is an actual OnStar call: Woman: Help, my pussy is stuck in my car! It's getting hot and it's not breathing very well! Phone guy: Calm down ma'am, we'll unlock the doors for you. *click* Woman: Ah, thank you. Now my labia minora are all stretchy." I mean, if someone's in a paniced situation and they press a button and they're saved, were they really in all that much danger to begin with? And if they were in danger, is that the sense that OnStar wants to convey in their ads? Yes, I realize that the ad is technically about how they are there to get you *out* of the issue you're experiencing, but the ad itself forces you to vicariously live through the issue before it's resolved. I'd rather not have to live through negative stuff on the radio.

Then we get to a really especially brain-damaged set of ads: ads that are actually selling phones. There's a new one which is especially disgusting. A mother and daughter are yelling at each other, but the lines are generic complaints that have been modified to make them actually praise the person they're talking to instead. So we have a commercial where two people are having a teenager/mother arguement, but it's supposed to be funny that they're saying "I LOVE YOU!" angrily. No, sorry. You fail. It's still angry. Which makes me angry. And it makes me not want to buy your phone.

There are some other hits and misses. The family that is on a tight plan and talks to each other over their phones like auctioneers? Not clever and the father is too smugly patriarchal. The one where two guys are strapped to chairs while their family talks and a timer counts down the minutes? This one is actually funny. The one where people talk in a big white room while scientists measure stuff? Amusing, usually. I think the difference between the auctioneers and the rest is that, in the first case, you're showing brain-dead behaviour which is obviously being forced upon the rest of the family by one moron member (probably the father), whereas in the other cases it's more like satirising generic complaints and characitures that are commonly associated with cell phone usage.

There are occasionally good commercials with phones in them, but they almost are never specifically about the phone itself being used. OnStar? Advertising what is essentially a phone service. Budweiser ads with "wazzuuup/true"? While the guys are often talking on phones, the ad itself is essentially about nothing, so it can be amusing.

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